Although I was raised a Baptist, I backslid into the Episcopal faith twenty years ago and haven’t looked back. Imagine my surprise, then, to return home and find my answering machine blinking away with not one but two messages from none other than the Rev. Jerry Falwell. As it turns out, Rev. Falwell was not calling to beckon me back to the Baptist fold but to urge me to vote for state Senator Nancy Schaefer, his longtime “Christian friend” and one of the strongest “Christian official[s] serving the people of Georgia today.”
As a strident opponent of abortion Ms. Schaefer definitely meets the Rev.’s definition of “Christian,” but I wonder if Jesus would buy into her argument that Roe v. Wade should be overturned because legalized abortions are cutting into our supply of cheap labor, which, in turn, forces employers to hire illegal aliens. From what I’ve heard, Jesus just didn’t seem to think along these lines or make these kinds of connections. Perhaps he simply wasn’t as advanced in his Christian thinking as Sen. Schaefer.
Here’s something else that would never occur to Jesus, I bet. Sources tell me that in keeping with his party's commitment to "family values" Karl Rove is already negotiating with the Iraqis to have Saddam hung at halftime of the Super Bowl. Rumor is, before he decided to go this route, Rove asked himself, "What Would Janet Do?"
